Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Update on the Neighbor Situation!

Thought I would give the few of you who read my blog an update on the "Loss of Innocence" post. I talked with the counselors at school about the situation and one of the counselors offered to call the other girl's Mom and explain the situation (so of course being the coward I am, I jumped at the chance to pass that messy duty on to someone else!)

So about two days later, I am in my family room and there is a knock on the door. It is the Neighbor girl, her Mom and her older brother. The Mother wants the girl to apologize to me and my child. We just kind of jump into the subject when I realize that my daughter's friend is standing there, soaking up all this info. So I stop everything and send the friend up to my daughter's room. (I am thinking "great... now I have to explain this mess to HER MOM!")

Long story short.... the Mom makes the daughter apologize and tries to tell me that it just popped up, that none of her children were looking at those sites. I put on my best diplomatic face and suggested to the Mom that she might want to look into it a little further since the girl had to type in an address for not one but two different sites. I was really proud of my daughter because, she was by far the smallest of all of us standing there but she stood her ground and she told the truth about what happened. She even told the girl's Mom that she treatened her...that she should not tell anyone about the sites. (I did not know about the threats before this point) The family was trying to blame it on the little girl but I just kept pointing out little things that did not add up. I did not want to insult anyone but I also did not want this little girl to be blamed for this completely.

I think everyone went away okay with the situation. I told the girl's mother that she was welcome to come over and play with my daughter and that I thought she was a sweet girl who just got caught up in some stuff she did not understand. I also diplomatically suggested that maybe a Mother Daughter talk was in order, since she seemed to have some mistaken ideas about women's roles, etc....

After they left, I went upstairs and gave my daughter a big hug and told her how proud I was of her. She stood up for the truth even when the adults were telling her she was mistaken. I told her I was proud that she told us about the sites even when she was treatened. (that was the info that got my shackles up, was that the girl treatened my child!)

BTW--I am good friends with the other child's mom so I explained the situation to her and she was fine with it. She laughed when I told her about it and that I was afraid her child was going to come home and say " Mom what is oral s#$?"

So I think all is going to be okay. We live, we learn and we move on to other things!


hamiam said...


So glad that this wasn't as messy as it could have been.

Sigh of relief!

TMK said...

wow! I bet that was fun for you. glad it all went smoothly.

aggiejenn said...

I'm glad she came over and you were able to talk about it. Good for your daughter that she told you despite the threats. Y'all obviously have a great relationship!

Anonymous said...

I was gone all last week, so am just getting caught up with blogging and wanted to comment here about your neighbor situation. I'm glad it's turned out as positively as it has. Like I said before, I don't think your daughter will be permanently harmed in any way and might actually learn some very good lessons in other ways from it and the way you're obviously handling it.

I think it shows a lot of guts on the other mother's part to come over, bringing her daughter and her son with her, and that was a very good thing for her to do.

God bless you all. God bless the children.


proud parents said...

I am so glad this situation is finally resolved. It sounds like you handled it very well. I might have been tempted to not answer the door when I saw them all standing there. :) It sounds like your daughter is a very strong young woman. You are doing a great job!